Separation Anxiety URGENT HELP NEEDED

by Lynn Vander Hoek
(New Liskeard Ontario Canada)

I have just gotten a new horse, I have had her now for a month... she is very big and strong headed, with no ground manners etc.... she was in a herd with 80 or better horses when I got her... she was transported with to me with 5 other horses from the same herd. I stabled her at a friends barn for the first 3 weeks of having her, but due to circumstances she had to be moved because the owner of the barn was intimidated by her size and was afraid of her. I had to move her last weekend to another stable, where she is now with one of the horses she was delivered with..... total of 3 horses in the barn.

I now have the problem of when turning the horses out for the day, she literally destroys her stall when one of the other horses if removed from the barn for turn out. We have tried putting her out first and the the other horses to follow, but she again literally went through the fencing.... today she went over the stall door to get out... it is like a switch is flipped and she looses all control.

I have called the original owner to see if there were any problems like this in the past.... she said no, but has offered to take the horse back, which was an option,however, she then called me, offering me my money back and telling me to put the horse down.... I am just sick over this and do not want to give up on this horse... she is only 2, and her ground manners are workable with consistent training.... though I am lost as to what to do about the separation anxiety..... I do not want to see her or anyone else get hurt due to her actions..... do you have any suggestions....... I am desperate to help this horse.


Hi Lynn,

You have more than just separation anxiety at play here. Her world has been shaken up and she is in full survival mode. She is so young and only believes that protection comes in the form of a herd not people. She is not going to be comfortable with being stabled at this point. Instead she finds this life threatening. This is apparent when a horse is willing to risk their own personal safety and the safety of anyone in their way to get back to a comfortable herd environment and outdoors where space represents more safety to them.


The first thing I would do is keep her in an outdoor paddock with her friend(s) 24/7, not a confining space like a stall (even if it’s just for the night, that’s 10-12 hours anyway). She needs more time to adapt to her new living environment and I can’t stress this enough, she is only 2 which means she needs open space to move constantly. Getting comfortable in a new environment takes longer than most people realize. But in the very least I would not ask anything of her for a least a week. Then I would start working on getting her trust while she is with the herd before removing her from them. (I always work with a horse where “they” are most comfortable in the beginning. That way they remain in a “thinking” state of mind. No horse or human can learn when they are unable to focus or in a stressful state of mind.)

This page may offer you some further insight too regarding Training Young Horses

We forget that horses are not born with manners as we define the word. They are born with different innate abilities and dispositions. Manners are taught through training and handling which this horse doesn’t seem to have been exposed to coming from such a huge herd. No reputable horse seller would suggest putting a horse down rather than taking it back and supplying proper training or being completely honest about a horse.

You may be better off looking at this horse like you just removed her from the wild. You would have a tough time taking a wild horse from its home and herd then put it directly into a domesticated/confined environment because their flight instinct is so strong. (Well you could but you would need steel fencing! And that is how people do it.)

How did it go when you had to trailer her the second time to this new place? What are you able to do with her without resistance on her part? How does she act when you take her “into” the barn stall? Why are the horses stalled?

Environmental conditions are what I would suggest you focus upon first. That will strengthen her emotional stability.

Elaine Polny